LIVING LA VIDA LOCA!!!

It was a pleasant surprise when Faizal showed up for a while at the All
Sports Cafe… it was a casual buka puasa do i organized for the Rockensteiners. About a dozen came. Nobody knows he’d drop by but Dragon did mentioned to me he’ll ask Faizal to drop by if he can.

And walla.. he did came! Walaupun sekejap gumbira juga raser hati ini.. aku minat Faizal Hussein lebih sedekad pon tak penah jumpe.. Minat Faizal baru tahun nih dah dapat jumpe.. hahahaha.. sape Rockensteiners yang tak join or cancel last minute.. too bad guys..

To those yg haven’t sign up, please do at http://faizaltahir.proboards83.com. Here’s a few pix of me with FAIZAL (Yay!!!) and with the other Rockensteiners. The one in Superman tee is my partner. We’re joint Project Managers for the Rockensteiners Launching tentatively set this Nov 26th.

After more than 3 weeks being a fanatic of Faizal Tahir of OIAM (skarang dah tak berape fanatik coz i found out that i kinda-know his wife, huehue - i mean, cam pelik minat giler kat husband member kan? hahaha), and spending the whole puasa (so far) engrossed with everything about him (yeah i know, saiko, first time wei minat solo singer kat Malaysia nih!!), (okay kinda terpesong from the objective - i just wana say how boring my life is now that i even have time to be a fanatic fan to a singer) i got an unexpected sms which surprised me and  somehow overwhelmed me a little bit.

I have a friend. A very nice guy. He used to pick me up at Section 17 subuh2 hari (back then Kak We wasn’t in Shah Alam) and send me a can of Coke to my apartment malam2 buta before my final exam. I always thought it was only favours done by a friend. I mean, this guy is known as one of the nicer ones in the faculty, so he could have done the same thing to anyone. 

But tonight, after he’s already ENGAGED, only just now he told me that "i was serious, tapi you take it as a joke. What to do then, maybe you weren’t interested". I was perplexed at first, then surprised then was like "wtf?" and after it sank in, i was a bit overwhelmed. And being a person who always think of the IFs in my life… a caleidoscope of images ran through my head. All the IFs were jogging through my tired brain (it was near 1am).. Laaa.. biler maser pulak nih? Tak penah perasan any hint pon? I never really dated anyone from my Faculty. I think I know the reason why but malas nak citer kat sini nanti misconstrued and deemed perasan pulak.

Something suddenly bypassed my mind. A friend (a guy who met his ex during Mingle2 in the park. haha) actually pointed out  to me that that guy actually fits my criteria. He laughingly said "aku tau kau suker orang macam dier, smayang on time, pandai… pegilaa tackle dier" and I did nothing about it. Seriously, maybe a lot of people think i flirt a lot. To say that i don’t will be a lie. But i’ve never pursued anyone that i REALLY like. Orang kater "hanya memandang dari kejauhan". And all the guys i used to like or like are always TAKEN. I’ve never broken anyone’s relationship before and i don’t have any intention to do it in the future. No matter how much i like that certain person, i don’t wanna built a relationship out of someone’s misery. So i won’t do anything (though sometimes i did wish they’ll break up and will hook up with me. only SOMETIMES okay!).

Not that there wasn’t anyone who confessed to me before, but it has been quite a long time since someone did. WHY IS IT THAT IT’S ALWAYS TOO LATE??? WHY CAN’T THEY JUST COME TO ME AND SAY IT? WHY DIDN’T THEY TRY HARD ENOUGH? AM I THAT DIFFICULT OR INTIMIDATING? Or they are just being guys? Afraid too much about getting their egos injured and afraid of rejection?

I opened my gallery of 1300 ++ pictures in my laptop and search for our pictures. There were like 5 pictures of us during the faculty’s programmes. Smiling to the camera. Oh God. Why does this always happen to me? I know i hurt someone in the past. But only ONE. And i already paid for it when i was hurt sooooo much it took me 3 years to forget it (which when i think of it now it was a bloody waste of time actually).

Or maybe what he had for me was lust. That’s why he never tried hard enough. *sigh… ader sape2 lagi ker yang nak buat confession nih? hahahaha… kidding2… am actually making fun of myself for the things that i missed.

-600 hari mencari cinta-

This is a song that can rival Dealova… heheheheheh… This song was composed for Faizal Tahir and sang during One In A Million Finale. It has been recorded as a single and will be out soon.

Begitu berat melangkah
melihat kau bersamanya
Adakah aku yang salah
atau hanya helah saja

Ku masih mencintai diri kamu
Biar kau menjauh
Ku rindu…

Kau bagaikan udara
yang membantu aku untuk terus hidup di atas dunia
Tanpamu ku lemah
pasti aku tak berdaya
Kerna kau mahakarya cinta…

Biarpun kau tidak mahu
menerima kasih daku
Ku kan setia bersamamu
sehingga ke akhir waktu

Ku masih menyayangi diri kamu
Biar kau berlalu
Ku rindu…

Kau bagaikan udara
yang membantu aku untuk terus hidup di atas dunia
Tanpamu ku lemah
pasti aku tak berdaya
Kerna kau mahakarya cinta

Kau takkan dapat aku lupakan
kerna kaulah punca cinta kita
Mengajar aku erti bahagia
Kembalilah……….

Terimalah pesan daku
yang akan terus menunggu…

I’m so bloody dissapointed with the outcome of OIAM. But there’s no doubt in my mind that everybody who watched the OIAM finale knows who is the real deal, the real talent, the MOST DESERVING.

Faizal is so damn talented that even someone like me, who mostly listen to only mainstream music and don’t play any particular instrument can appreciate his talent and know that this guy HAS it.

The combination and arrangement of the 3 songs (wE wILL rOCK yOU, L.O.V.E. & i dON’T wANNA bE) was so damn fantastic (that even Paul Moss called him a ‘freaking smart’ fella) and he performed it perfectly and ‘rocked everyone to oblivion’ (like he likes to say it).

I was soooooooooooo freaking PROUD of FAIZAL I almost cried watching him performed the medley.. It was the best ever performance from a local star I ever watched. Damn good. I wanted to kick myself for not trying hard enough to get the tickets to watch the Finale at PWTC.

There’s so much to say but right now i’m busying myself entering every forum that’s discussing about Faizal so i’ll just continue this tomorrow. Promise!!

Hey i’m back. sorry, still not in the right state of mind so can’t compose a coherent entry here. All jumbled up. Still frustrated my Superman kena Kriptonite semalam. Anyway, i’ll paste what i’ve been posting in forums today. Here goes..

"SUPER TALENTED, GREAT SHOWMANSHIP THAT OUTCLASSED EVERYONE ELSE, BRILLIANT MUSICIAN, FLAWLESS ENGLISH WITH ALMOST PERFECT DICTION, NICE FELLA, AND AIMING TO CONTRIBUTE FOR THE BETTERMENT OF THE MUSIC INDUSTRY.. WHAT ELSE CAN WE ASK FOR?

IZAM (that’s 8TV’s COO to those not in the know), DO SOMETHING!!! I KNOW YOU HAVE AN EYE FOR GREAT TALENTS. YOU SHOULD BE KICKING YOURSELF RIGHT NOW THAT SUKI WON.

THE VOTING SYSTEM FAILED, THE VOTING LINES WERE CONGESTED (ONLY VOTES FOR SUKI PASSED THRU), AND THE PROGRAMME SCHEDULE WAS BAD!!!!

YOU SHOULD LET THEM PERFORM THEIR SONGS FIRST B4 THE OTHER FINALISTS PERFORM. THAT SHOULD BE THE WAY. IT’S NOT FAIR THAT ONLY 5 MINUTES AFTER THE ASTOUNDING SUPER-PERFORMANCE FROM FAIZAL THAT ALMOST BROUGHT PWTC DOWN, THE LINES WERE CLOSED (AND I SERIOUSLY DOUBT THAT THE TALLY WAS ACCURATE). HOW CAN OTHERS VOTE WHEN THE LINES WERE BLOODY CONGESTED?

AND BELIEVE ME, MY FRIENDS AND I WERE NEVER VOTERS FOR REALITY SHOWS BUT THIS TIME AROUND WE VOTED COZ WE SEE TALENT IN FAIZAL THAT NONE OTHER CONTESTANT CAN RIVAL, NOT EVEN CLOSE. AND WHAT HAPPENED TO CONVERTS LIKE US? WE DIDN’T GET OUR VOTES COUNTED BECAUSE THE FAILURE OF THE VOTING LINES. YOU HAVE TO DO SOMETHING TO MAKE IT UP TO FAIZAL. I KNOW UR A GREAT MAN, IZAM, YOU CAN’T SLEEP IF YOU LET FAIZAL’S AMAZING TALENT GO DOWN THE DRAIN OR WASTED OR NOT HELPED. YOU HAVE THE INDUSTRY NETWORKS AT YOUR DISPOSAL. PLEASE DO WHAT’S RIGHT."

Hehe… emo.. yes i know.. so what? salah ker emo kalau we see a gifted person like that lost because of lousy sms votes?

Malas nak type tonite.. wil update later kalau rajin.. here’s a few pix..

This song has been tugging at my heart strings ever since i heard it on TV.. puitis dan bermakna liriknya… the music arrangement is just… great… this song really touched my heart.. for no particular reason..

Disini kau dan aku
terbiasa bersama
menjalani kasih sayang
bahagiaku denganmu

pernahkah kau menguntai
hari paling indah
ku ukir nama kita berdua
disini surga kita

bila kita mencintai yg lain
mungkinkah hati ini akan tegar
sebisa mungkin tak akan pernah
sayangku akan hilang

if u love somebody
could we be this strong
i will fight to win
our love will conquer all
wouldn’t reach my love
even just one night
our love will stay in my heart
my heart

pernahkah kau menguntai
hari paling indah
ku ukir nama kita berdua
disini surga kita

bila kita mencintai yg lain
mungkinkah hati ini akan tegar
sebisa mungkin tak akan pernah
sayangku akan hilang

bila kita mencintai yg lain
mungkinkah hati ini akan tegar
sebisa mungkin tak akan pernah
sayangku akan hilang

if u love somebody
could we be this strong
i will fight to win
our love will conquer all
wouldn’t reach my love
even just one night
our love will stay in my heart
my heart… my heart… my heart…

-A’a, 500 hari mengejar cinta-

My beloved petsis, JA and the love of her life, Kamal Rossi. Selamat Pengantin Baru!!! May your love grow stronger as time passes by…

My head’s already spinning..and it’s not even 2am yet! Being the original, accident-prone Tengku Nor Azah, I just bumped my head to the shower’s wall. Bodoh? Memang. Clumsy? Amat. But was really cold laah.. shower kol 11.30pm!! (yeah yeah sis.. i’ve heard of pneumonia but i played futsal tadi, takleh kalo tak mandi), sebab tuh jalan tak betul sket maser nak walk out of the shower tuh. Was shivering and seeing stars..

HAPPY 26th BIRTHDAY Kak We!! We had brownies with her name on it and drank coke. Surprise menjadi. Diet Kak We berjaya diruinkan. Maser my birthday sebenarnyer dah ader syak wasangka dier nak buat surprise for me actually. Wahahahah…

Tadi petang training. Tak guner punyer Akma, cakap 5.30pm, 6.15pm tak nampak lagi batang hidung. Punyerlaa aku kelam kabut nak pegi training sampai tak sempat pun makan goreng pisang yg beli kat Section 2!

Strikers played against Defenders. We ran a bit, sprinted a bit, and for the first time ever i did some real warming up (alaa.. macam PJ maser skolah dulu, tapi sumer orang malas nak kira 1 sampai 8). Scored 3 of the 4 goals (the practice ended 4-4, coz dah azan Maghrib). Am told us to take shots (twice each). So kitorang pun konon2nyer rembat cam penalty shots laa. One of the girls even asked canner nak buat curved ball tu.. Am bantai gelak jer.. straight shot pon tak masuk.. nak buat curve.. hahahaha.. yeah.. we’re a bunch of clowns. really.

I did my shots. More than twice. Tak satu pun masuk. Isk. And che’ ah scored one. Second time, Am got the ball. But the third time, the ball got to the ‘other’ pair of balls. Ouch!!!! I saw it. They heard it. Damn it must hurt. Am terbaring keperitan. Someone jerit "takleh tolong! bukan muhrim!!!" (hahah. dat was original!) and silly Akma was singing "Ha ha.. jangan kawen dengan Am, jangan kawen dengan Am"..

Adoi.. kesian coach.. dier pulak injured. So sorry for you coach. And Akma, ur new sluar seriously looks like swimming tights okay (rugi saper tak tengok. seksi habes. nasib si Am tuh takder perasaan jer.. i assume laa.. ;p)

Gotta go.. my head’s f**king throbbing.. Sorry..  kepala sakit dey.. foul language sket. Saket nih.. tak terkater!! risau gak mati segala sel2 otak containing pelajaran yang baru ditimba semalam dan tertukar nama2 boyfriend.. Ngahahahaha.. no lah, juz playing. Dun have any. Girlscout swear! Over and out.

p/s : waaa.. dah teraser benjol kat kepala nih!!!! silly me. hantuk kepala sendiri kat dinding.. hueheue…psycho and loca.

I’m sick. Maybe everything that transpired this past week has finally taken it’s toll on me.. Crazy.. I haven’t eaten anything decent today and it’s already 9.05pm!! Only one mantou bun Kak We steamed this morning.. God!! this is BAD!!!

You guys must be wondering where is the love story.. nantilaaa…. not well nih.. i’ll update when i’m well aight… read my previous entries first.. huehueheu.. 

Oh God.. it’s been almost two weeks… i know i haven’t update this entry.. i’ve been thinking of the content a lot.. and i realise that i can’t really tell you my love stories.. the love that i had for my exes was genuine and not stupid. it’s the things that occured when i’m not attached are stupid. I won’t call them ‘flings’ (or more popularly called ’scandals’).. i can’t even label what they were.. har har har.. Confused? he he.. in order not to be labeled a player, swinger, dan yang sewaktu dengannya, (coz it’s amazing how people can misinterpret things into ridiculous speculations) i chose not to actually tell the stupid love stories.

Sorry folks, there’s too many parties involved. And most of my exes are in my friend list, and i have underaged cousins in this Friendster. I can’t afford to tell a story that could be blown out of proportions and misconstrued. 

And just for the record, it never fail to amuse me how people think i know a lot of the so-called "hot stuff", "hunks" and the likes of it. Hey I don’t even have one for myself okay! And please know that i’m not impressed or at awe with any movie stars (the local ones of course), celebrities or any VIPs’ sons. Maybe i’ve went out with one or two, but that’s because they are just people like us. They just happen to be famous. That’s it.

And now that my horizon has expanded (friendsterly speaking), i can’t even specify what i actually look in a man coz i’m afraid some parties will be offended. I know that people have different takes on life and everybody is entitled for their own opinion. So, if there are people out there interested to know, u can pm me. Maybe i’ll give the answer, maybe not (but my close buddies already know what’s in my mind. Harharhar).

A’a out. (say it like "Seacrest Out!")

I rushed to Kota Damansara. To get to Nofad’s place by 10pm as promised. or.. was it 10.30pm?? luper lak?? I exited at Kota Damansara (coz D’sara exit jem bangat), sesat a bit, habiskan credit mintak direction then arrived at her apartment.. cam best gak arr apartment Nofad nih. Rupenye minah nih tak mandi pun lagi since balik keje. Wan arrived about the same time with me. We waited for Nofad to shower and Liza to get ready, then off we went to Damansara Perdana. And of all the places.. we went to Friendster Cafe. Our first time there.. I thought it’s just a small cafe, but apparently it’s a really nice one!

We ordered and Me and Wan went to choose the cake on display.

to be continued…

Dah 4.30am… lebih 4 jam lepas ko letupkan cracker tuh kat muker aku.. pedih muka aku kau tau tak. buduh. dahlaa telinga aku pun berdengung lagi sebab kau tiup benda alah tue kat telinga aku. mangkuk! mangkuk!! aku dah nak offline dah sebenarnya, tapi biler aku raser telinga aku berdengung semacam jer, aku masuk balik friendster sebab nak maki kau dalam blog aku.

Hahahah.. aku tak luper ko blanjer kek tadi.. tapi masih tak dapat dioffsetkan dgn telinga aku yg tgh berdengung dan muka aku yg pedih nih. I’ll send u my medical bills. cilaka ko wan. demm you..

p/s : dahler compounded ngan hati yg sakit disebabkan kes sakit jiwa yg berlaku time kunci kete ko hilang. tsk! tsk!