AKITANITI MAS AYU - teacher, mentor and a GREAT FRIEND
Wednesday, November 22nd, 2006Al-Fatihah. Sesungguhnya dari Dia kita datang, kepada-Nya kita kembali. I love you so much Niti, and i hope u know that.
November 25th, 3.11 am
It’s been three days since she left. And the last night of tahlil for her. I went to her in-laws’ house today. I’m still at a loss on what to say here. Not because there’s nothing to say about her… because there’s too many things to say. I don’t even know where to begin with.
I think I’ll begin about how she went (from what i was told by her family). Actually before Ramadhan she asked me out, saying she had something to tell me. So we went to KLCC. We had lunch and talk about the usual stuff and trading gossips. I asked her what she wanted to tell me. But she just told me to eat and talk about me first. Towards the end only she told me the news. She already had a donor. For her bone marrow transplant. She told me so nonchalantly. Like it’s nothing big.
She told me her doctor wanted her to do the transplant immediately but she said she had to finish some work at the office and she wanted to Raya first. She said that her chances of recovering is high since she’s still young. 33 years old. Only 9 years gap.
Then we buka puasa together at Midvalley. About 10 days before Raya. God.. If only i knew that was the last of her that i would see. I would have hugged her tighter when we said our goodbyes. I would have kissed her harder. Oh God.. the things that I would have done…..
She said she’s going to the hospital soon for check up. As usual i didn’t ask her much because she never wanted me to visit . She didn’t want people to see her when she’s sick. And she said her room will be sterilized and if people want to visit they have to scrub themselves first before going in. I said I’ll do it if I have to. But i honestly can’t recall whether I asked her to inform me when she’s going to hospital. Now i feel like kicking myself for not asking more. She was being vague about it. Not having a confirmed date. She only said she wanted to do it after raya. I don’t remember her mentioning chemotherapy though.
I was sick during Raya and didn’t even study when i was back home. So i couldn’t be bothered to send any raya smses. I only replied to those who sent to me. I can’t recall whether i wished her or not. I’m such an idiot.
Ok. I know a lot of my fellow friends from MRSM KT are curious. I’ll make this shorter. She was admitted on second day of raya. She did 3 weeks of chemo (she texted me telling she just did her chemo. She didn’t even complain about the pain or hell she went through). Then she went home. But then she fell sick again so was re-admitted to the hospital.
Her condition worsen… and she left us on Tuesday evening after her body couldn’t take it anymore. Now i know why her husband was adamant not letting people to view her. I was told that her condition was very bad. Caused by chemo. She suffered. And i didn’t even know. I thought everything was alright since she still texted me before she went home. Oh God. If only I knew her condition was so bad. If only I asked more. I didn’t want to text her much cause I didn’t want to disturb her. And she didn’t answer calls when she was in hospital.
I’ll tell more when i hear more from her family ok. I gotta go now, esok ader interview. later. To sape2 yang baca this especially ex-KT, please, sedekah Al-Fatihah. Yaasin would be better. I dun want her to suffer there.
