LIVING LA VIDA LOCA!!!

Don’t get too excited ppl. I’m not crying my heart out here. I just want to narrate a love story. Past and present.

Last month I was invited by ex to attend his wedding. I was quite surprised, though not shocked.  He’s been talking about marrying his girlfriend for more than a couple of years.  It’s just a matter of time. And graduation (only for him, his wife still has a semester to go if I’m not mistaken).

I offered to invite our other schoolmates since I knew he hasn’t been keeping in touch with most. He declined at first, but then texted me to do it because he only has a few numbers.

i gotta run now.. i’ll catch up later.. i’ve to attend a wedding tomorrow morning..

Okay2… lek2… jangan panik.. this is not my question to any of you. It was an sms i received juz now at 00:38:38 12-17-2005 from someone..

And i reply something to the effect "well, honestly i can never marry a penzina, but if it’s a consolation, i’m sure we’ll have great sex if i marry you".. And came the angry and insulted reply, "Penzina.. Thanks 4 being honest. Never thought u think of me as low as that. What about not being friends at all. A sinless girl like u with a penzina wouldn’t make a good pair. Thanks anyway, tengku permaisuri.."

The thing is, i don’t want to beat around the bush, so that’s the only reason I can give him (i didn’t mention about him never finishing his studies and never stick to one job). I don’t want him to have any illusions that it is even remotely POSSIBLE.. Well, what i can say at this time, a partnership with Ameen sounds more logical than a partnership with him. Ngeheheh..

I don’t understand people these days.. not praying is natural, not puasaing also not a big deal at all, sex is also normal… not that I’m a saint myself.. i occasionally (and recently always) miss my prayers (subuh mostly).. but i try to perform it as best as I could and qada’ whatever prayer i missed.. and it’s between me and God whether he wants to accept it or not.

But how can people calling themselves Muslims but give no regard at all to the Rukun Islam?? How can Muslims condone sex?? Hell yeah i know sex is the best thing in the world, sex is a bliss u can’t find elsewhere.. i’m perfectly aware of that.. but why can’t we just wait?? And why mock people who’s against pre-marital sex? Well, I don’t hate people who have pre-marital sex, extra-marital sex. They are also in my circle of friends. But I just can’t MARRY anyone like that. Not when there’s a saying in the Qur’an they’ll be keturunan penzina for SEVEN GENERATIONS!!!

Well, i’m not here to preach actually.. My point is, I need someone who can guide me, dunia and akhirat. i don’t want to be the one guiding.. it’s too heavy a burden to carry. And i don’t need someone with overbearing ego who cannot hear blunt honesty. He is very good looking.. and well mannered.. with a sense of humor.. but that’s just not enough…